The Journey

When I started my spiritual journey I had a destination in mind. I wanted to become a more mindful, compassionate, loving person. I wanted to stop judging myself and others, be able to listen to my own inner wisdom and share that wisdom with others. I realize now, the journey never ends. I have learned a great deal and have acquired many skills to help me continue, but I see now how naive I was to think that in some way it had an ending. 

Our spiritual journey is like a parallel journey within this amazing experience we call life. It is a mindful, deliberate decision to become more connected to our own spirit, more of who we already are. Ironically, it is a journey that requires us to stop in order to be on it. For it is when we pause and listen to ourselves and others, when we stop to hear what it is our mind, body, and spirit are trying to share with us, that we are in fact moving forward. In a world where we are all in such a hurry, often so busy and stressed, I hope it is comforting to know that our greatest achievement will most likely happen when we are still.  

when we stop

when we listen with our hearts,

when we see

through the eyes of our soul...

we are home,

and for a moment,

we become the light and love

  we seek...

pb

Saying Goodbye

Saying goodbye, building bridges...

It is the last week of August and it is a sad thought that we will have to say goodbye to summer. ( Was she really here?) I will particularly miss paddling, I love settling into a rhythm with the wind and sun on my face, sitting on top of the water, feeling a oneness with the River. I will even miss braving the cold water to go swimming, ( kinda) and of course, I will miss the decadent bbq's, pontoon boat tours with family and friends, and travelling around this beautiful province we live in.
Thinking about saying goodbye to summer has prompted thoughts about saying goodbye in general. It occurred to me that our lives are made up of a series of goodbyes...goodbye to the home we grew up in, goodbye to friends, to our home town, to our children when they move out, and most difficult, goodbye to those we love who are no longer with us.
 As we move through life there are hundreds of doors we go through that force us to say farewell to people, places, and things. Some of the goodbye's are heart wrenching, others a relief, each one bringing it's own unique blend of feelings. When I think about all the goodbyes I have made, it is a little overwhelming, but also reassuring...each one paved the way for a new beginning, and each one helped me to grow a little stronger, more compassionate, and self aware.
 Writing about this has also made me realize that at the time of our goodbyes we are often too overwhelmed with emotion to fully appreciate the significance of the moment. Often it is with teary eyes we hug, clinging to whom ever and what ever we are saying goodbye. There is a sadness that pervades the going...it is as if our hearts are understanding the loss more quickly than our heads. It is often not until we take the time to reflect later that we can process what we really left behind. It is also when we have time to go through the stages of grieving, and see more clearly not only what we lost, but what has been gained.
Although saying goodbye is very difficult, letting go always seems to be cathartic. It is when we let go that we create a space inside for new light, love, and growth to enter. With each season's passing, Mother Nature reminds us that saying goodbye is a natural part of our lives and that whether we embrace it or not, change is inevitable. It is up to us what we do with it...hopefully we allow ourselves to grieve, process, and move forward with faith.
 Ironically, it seems to me that goodbye is more like a hello in many ways, for it is a moment when we meet those rather poignant feelings that, like a bridge, connect our hearts and souls to the special people and places we are leaving. So savour those goodbyes, they are some of the most precious moments in our lives!

goodbye 

so often is really hello

a moment

when we connect fully,

our hearts and souls
speak to us,
building beautiful bridges,

so the love 

travels with us...

penny bowman

Finding Joy

Heart Connections

Finding Joy

I am reading a wonderful book right now by Jennifer Louden that is really helping me to apply many of the spiritual lessons I have learned over the years. To know something intellectually is one thing, but to incorporate it into your life is often a huge challenge. That takes time and commitment, as well as tools that work for you.
 In Life Organizer, Jennifer has shared some simple strategies to help us focus our minds and open our hearts. It is definitely helping me. I am taking the time (some days more than others) to hear what my heart has to say, and doing my best to honour that wisdom. The result is, I feel more joy and less stress. I am also gaining new insights, peeling away more layers and going deeper within.

 If you want to have a closer connection with your heart, an easy way to start is to think of your heart as an old friend you have been ignoring, and begin paying attention to it. Most of us spend far more time in our heads than our hearts. Simply taking a little time each day to breathe into your heart, pause, and feel the energy that is there, is a great beginning. I personally know that I have connected with my heart when I break out with a big smile and feel myself relax. Once you make this connection, (for each of us it will be unique) you will want to keep going back for more, and as you do, you will build a relationship with yourself that will change your life from the inside out!

Like any relationship it requires time and some give and take. Ask a lot of questions, and listen, really listen. The questions are the gateway to hearing the wisdom your heart has to offer. Think of your heart as an amazing guide that can help you understand what it is that makes you feel joyful and what you can do to be there more often.

It really is quite easy, just ask your heart simple questions, like, what experience do you yearn for today, or what does my body need to feel loved and cared for? When you are ready, the questions can go deeper, for example you can ask,  if I did not feel vulnerable what would I like to do, what emotions am I holding back, etc. Try to make sure after you have received some feedback that you follow through with any actions needed to honour that wisdom. It is a good idea to keep a journal with the answers and insights you receive. I find it really rewarding to look back in my journals and see the progress I've have made, or be reminded of something I had forgot.  

One of the things I learned through this process is that I often avoid feeling vulnerable. I seldom take risks and as a consequence I think I have missed out on some experiences that could have brought great joy and growth. I now encourage  myself to do things, (especially if I have avoided them in the past) because they make me feel uncomfortable ( sharing my writing and personal thoughts)
 I  have also learned (on a feeling level) the difference between joy and happiness. Both are an important part of our lives, but it is empowering to understand and embrace the difference. For me, joy comes from within, and is always there, like a peaceful river... happiness is fleeting, and comes from an external experiences. The good news is, to find joy we need only build a relationship with our hearts and souls and enjoy the love that is always there.

So my friends, thanks again for listening, supporting one of my passions, and helping me to feel less vulnerable. If this sparks something within you, I hope you will go after the love, wisdom, and joy your heart is waiting to share with you. 

  

From the Heart 

I am here for you,

in the quiet moments,

in the hustle and confusion...
I am a breath away,
come join me
in the vast oasis 

of love and pure joy

that is you home...

pb

For all the Mothers

Mother's Day is here and as the years go by, like so many others, I find myself appreciating my mother more and more. Every mother is unique in their own way, but the thread of motherhood is sown with humility, strength, grace and unconditional love.
My mother is no longer alive, but her legacy will forever enrich the lives she touched so deeply. I am honored to pay tribute to her and all the mothers who have, like artists, with their love and patience, and vision, helped to sculpt us from tiny infants into the people we are today. Like true artists, mothers seldom recognize their talents or the impact they have had. So for all the moms who underestimate their value, this is for you!

This is for the moms who:
 primarily see their imperfections and not their worth,
 put their children's needs first every day,
 smile even though they are tired, or in pain, or feeling down,
 listen with an open heart, and do not judge,
 go to bed exhausted because they have stayed up late doing something for their family,
 make the time to take their kids to hockey, ballet, soccer, skiing, and swimming etc.,
 patiently help their kids with their homework night after night,
 go to work every day and then come home and take care of their family
 make birthdays, graduations and Christmas into memories that will always be treasured,
 see the light in you, even when you cannot,
 make you feel capable and strong, especially when you think you have failed,
 tell you that you can do anything you set your mind to,
 do not realize it is ok that they are not perfect,
 make you feel loved and safe because you know there will always be someone who'll love you   unconditionally...
 long after they have passed, fill our hearts with love and strength and beautiful memories.


To all the moms, thank you for loving us into being...  Even though it may not always seem like it, the job you do every day has tremendous worth which can never really be measured, for each day, you are a role model for love in action. As a mom I understand the the impulse to criticize ourselves, we know how important our role is, which makes us painfully aware of our downfalls and mistakes. So thank you too, for helping us understand that it is our imperfections that often contribute to our unique and (hopefully) lovable nature. Thank you for teaching us that we are here to learn and are empowered and enriched not only by our successes, but by the gifts of our mistakes and imperfections.

Mom

It is not without

great pride,

 bittersweet tears,

 and heart smiles

that I remember you,

 With each passing year

I feel I love you better,

your resilience and strength

and unconditional love

are an integral part of me

as are your gifts of imperfection,

 gifts that I have come to lovingly embrace

as part of the wonderful legacy you left behind...

wish we had more time,

wish you had known,

loving thanks,

Penny

Things I Love

I recently read that it is very uplifting to make a list of all the things you love. The following is mine, although I must admit, there were far too many to be able to include them all...an uplifting observation in itself!

I love it when my daughters laugh,

 and when they hug each other,

I love remembering special times,

especially those spent with my mother,

I love family gatherings
 with bunny ears and lace,

 I love the smell of a wood fire, 

 the gifts that come with grace,

I love the wisdom of seniors, 

the innocence of a child,

I love butterflies and hummingbirds

the loons cry in the wild,

I love morning tea with honey,

time spent with good friends,

I love holding hands with my darling

as the day comes to an end,

I love the peacefulness of water,

majestic mountain peaks,

 I love daisies and lupins,

and when my spirit speaks,

I love the softness of words

when they light up my heart,

I love aboriginal paintings

the essence of art,

I love mindful moments,

paddle pics, stars above,
 I love knowing we're all connected

through our compassion and our love...

pb

This time of year can be difficult. The lack of sunlight and challenging weather conditions can take it's toll on our spirits. With this in mind I share this poem to all those who are struggling, and to those who are supporting them. I have come to strongly believe, that along with every shadow in our life, there is always light... sometimes we just need help finding it!

Hope

Sometimes in life

Tremendous trials come,

That bring great sadness and tears,

It seems as if our lives have changed,

Our vision blurred by fears,

Yet, beyond the darkness

There is always light,

to guide and inspire

And help renew our sight,

And where there is light

There is always love,

And where there is love,

There is hope…

When we seek light 

It will be there,

In smiles and kindness given,

In autumn leaves and gentle breeze,

Earthly angels send from heaven,,

Along with every shadow

There is always light,

And where there is light,

There is always love,

And where there is love

There is hope…

Penny Bowman

It is a new year! 2014 has arrived, and with it, our tendency to make resolutions. Although I find many resolutions are lacking enthusiasm, ( perhaps born from feeling pressured rather than inspired) I do love the idea of seeing the new year as an opportunity for change and growth. Endings by their very nature give rise to new beginnings, and what is more uplifting than the opportunity to start something new!
I find setting personal goals inspiring. The whole process of looking at oneself, being honest, and making a personal commitment to growth, is very admirable. Making a resolution takes honesty, courage, and faith, three excellent qualities we should all nurture on a regular basis.
One of the problems with New Year's resolutions is that they tend to be too vague. I find it very over whelming to think of setting a goal for a year! Yikes! What I learned from my personal experience as a peer leader with the Canadian Cancer Society's Living Well Beyond Cancer program was that goals need to be action oriented and measurable. Each week during the program peer facilitators and participants would set a goal (using guidelines from the program) and then return the next week to share their success with the group. If a goal was not reached we identified the possible barriers and brainstormed solutions. The guidelines for creating a goal was to write down what you were going to do, (an action) how much  or how long you would do it, and when. For example, instead of saying I want to get in better shape ( pretty vague ) you would say I am going to walk 2km in the morning four days a week. We also had participants rate on a ten point scale what they thought their likelihood of success would be. If they did not rate it a seven or more then we suggested they modify it until they felt more confident. One of the biggest lessons learned was to make the goal achievable.  Setting weekly goals that were achievable helped participants to succeed, and each success helped to build the foundation for the next goal and success. No matter big or small, it is empowering to achieve a goal and share that with others!( It also helps to be accountable to someone and have support if there is a problem) I loved the weekly goal setting and found it was a format that worked for everyone.
So... if there is something you want to accomplish and you have not got around to doing anything about it why not try setting a goal this week that you share with someone and see what can happen!

When we honour

the truth inside,

and let courage

take our hand,

faith will be ready

to help us go

where there are no limits...

PB

The Magic of Christmas

The Christmas season is one of my favourite times of the year. As if by magic, we are transformed, and our hearts and souls opened up to shine fully. It is a time when children believe in magic, and the world conspires, if only for a short time, to nurture that childlike quality for young and old alike.
It is the time of year we shed our selfishness and think of others. Individuals, families and communities raise money for those less fortunate as we are driven to ensure that every child and family are able to enjoy Christmas day. Strangers are no longer afraid of one another, but instead, reach out, join forces, and help one another. Friends and families celebrate their faith together, and share in the joy, and hope, and magic.
It is the time of year when families become nostalgic, and long to be together. Children come home, (often with their laundry) siblings reunite, and we remember what family means.
Christmas is a time when old memories are treasured and new ones created. Tradition takes on a new importance and we honor the past and those who helped create it. In my family it would not feel like Christmas if we did not decorate homemade gingerbread, watch White Christmas, and wait for the pajama elf on Christmas eve. At times traditions and memories can be bitter sweet when our hearts ache for those who helped create the traditions but are no longer with us.
 Unfortunately I just had to attend a celebration of life for the mother of a dear friend of mine. Ruth had lived a wonderful life and passed away at the age of ninety four. She was dearly loved by family and friends, one of those rare individuals who exuded amazing grace and kindness that touched all those who had the good fortune to spend time with her. At the celebration, the minister reminded the family to focus on their treasured memories of past Christmas's with Ruth, memories filled with joy and light and love. Ruth's strength is evident in her children and grandchildren so I am confident they will help each other to do just that.
Christmas is a time of miracles. It was born from a miracle and continues to give birth to new miracles every year, for it is a time when our hearts and souls come alive and the best of the human spirit is revealed and shared. My hope is that some day, that same spirit will dominant all year round!
Merry Christmas everyone, may you experience the full joy of Christmas in your heart and soul!
love and light,
Penny

the miracle

resides 

in each one of us,

the

 transformative,

infinite,

 powerful,

light of love...

     

Seeing with our Hearts

Building Connections

Recently the weather has taken a quick turn, and mother nature has given us a forceful reminder that winter is quickly approaching. As I write, it is a very frigid November morning, and with the wind chill, nineteen below! The ground is bearing the burden of a heavy frost, and I am feeling inclined to stay inside where my spirit and toes are warmed by sight and smell of the wood fire's dancing flames.

Since my last blog I have been trying to heed my own advice and spend more time mindfully. Perhaps it was partly due to the quick departure of seasonal temperatures, but I found myself feeling a little lost and disconnected.  After some journaling, meditation and healing work with a gifted friend, I accepted the fact that it was my own doing ( not the weather) and that I could turn things around with a little more effort and focus ( the latter being a challenge for me).  
As a part of my work, I realised that from an early age I had built an invisible  barrier between myself and others to avoid being hurt. Since it had reared it's invisible head, I figured now was the time to begin the healing process if I wanted the rewards of feeling more connected. I was not sure where to begin, for, like many others, this, I knew, was a life long strategy that was supported by a host of mistaken beliefs. In meditation I was told to see through my heart. I was not exactly sure what was being implied, ( other than the obvious) but I was happy to begin my work in such a warm, comfy place.

 I began the journey with love, forgiveness, and faith for I knew I was not alone and would be guided if I only asked. 

To see with my heart, to me, meant being in better touch with my heart. I set to work using my trusty allies, meditation, journaling, and introspection. As well, I paid closer attention to those delicious quiet pauses during the day when we often get our ah ha's. 
Our hearts are so majestic, it was time beautifully spent. I found of course, the more attention I paid to my heart, the more I felt a deeper connection within myself. I realised that this was what I needed to foster first. As I re-connected with my heart, it had the wonderful effect of helping me to feel my daily experiences on a deeper level..

This became very clear ( I love it when I get positive feedback) when I went to see the production of Les Miserables in Toronto this past weekend. I really enjoy live theatre, but I experienced it on a much deeper level than I ever had. I found myself taking a breath and closing my eyes during poignant songs so I could feel the emotion and savour the beautiful music more fully. I was brought to tears a few times, my heart touched deeply, and I felt an appreciation for the performers and the magnitude of work that went into the production. It was an experience I shall always remember and treasure.
 As I was reminiscing while I was writing this blog, I discovered that if I closed my eyes, and yes, took a breath, I could experience the same feelings again.The rewards of taking the time to re- connect with my heart.

I am feeling grateful and inspired by this experience. I realize that my spiritual work will be ongoing, but so will the rewards! I share it in the hopes that it may help others to remember to take time each day to pause, listen, and spend time with this beautiful gift we all share.

The Eyes of Love

to see with our hearts

   is but a soft breath away,
 mindful focus
that can gently bring us  

to exquisite moments

of beauty, peace and joy,

to see with our hearts

 is but a beautiful mirror,
 reflecting
 the kindred pulse of humanity
that magically connects us
 through the divine eyes of love...

PB

If You Go There

If you go There

Connecting

This fall was a wonderful treat. Unusually warm weather combined with autumn's hand print created an amazing environment for us to enjoy the fall kaleidoscope of colors. I say this, and yet I found myself complaining in the midst of this miraculous change because I knew what would soon follow. I know I am not alone in this thinking, come on, admit it... I heard you... Why do we do that? Instead of surrendering to the inevitable, and embracing the beauty that the "now" offers, we often ignore the rainbow and jump right over it, into a pile of mud! Our thinking takes us away from the present moment and we miss the gifts that surround us.

One of the reasons I decided to practice meditation was to learn how to slow down, stop, and become mindful of my thoughts, feelings and surroundings. ( I am much better than I used to be.)  It has been an amazing journey, one that has required a certain amount of patience, confidence and faith. So many people find it difficult at first, but as I discovered, it quickly becomes more natural and brings a wealth of unexpected benefits. Meditation not only helps to let go of mind and body stress, and strengthen mindfulness, it can also be a very powerful pathway for self discovery and healing. 

 It makes sense that taking time to be still and listen allows our hearts and souls an opportunity to communicate with us. To me it is similar to sitting down with a good friend and just listening, with no expectations, or judgements, just an open mind and loving heart. Through this communication we are better able to get to the heart of our problems and begin to heal ourselves. When we connect with our hearts and souls it is easier to understand, forgive, accept, and really love ourselves. We find out who we really are is beautiful. This in turn, helps us to do the same for others. Meditation becomes a catalyst for self discovery, inner peace, joy, mindfulness and healing. 

Much of my writing comes from my connection with spirit. When I step out of the way and allow inspiration to flow through me, I am often surprised (but always pleased) with the results. For those of you who have not tried meditation I encourage you to take the first step. There is a huge assortment of books and Cd's to help you get started, many of them freely available online. If you are one of those people who think they cannot do it, that is your first challenge... to embrace the possibility that if you go there, it will come!

Namaste my friends! Namaste. 

 A Breath Away

Within,

the peace you seek,

the love you desire,

a joy undiscovered,

within,

and only 

a breath away...

PBowman

  

Time with the River 

You are the One

Today I decided to take time to listen  my own spirit. I went down to the river, lulled by her stillness and the quiet that seemed to envelope me, as well as everything around me. I had a blissful meditation, remembering to just allow myself to focus on my breath to begin, then what I was feeling. The message was clear today.

You are the one

who brings peace,

it is always there

when you take the time

to go within

and enjoy the bliss

that love brings,

do not be afraid to dive deeply

into the depth of your love

 for you will discover an infinite pool

that will cleanse and heal 

any part of you

that is suffering,

such simple remedies await

if you take time,

You are the One

Although I have been meditating and listening to my spirit for quite awhile, it never ceases to amaze me when I connect and become inspired. It is like viewing the same beautiful scene over and over again and still being surprised and overwhelmed each time. Love is like that I suppose.
 It wasn't always so easy. I began my spiritual journey with my physical healing journey, slowly learning how to still my very active mind and body. As I peeled away layers and released mistaken beliefs and emotional pain, it made room for the light and love to enter and work it's magic. I share this so you know you can do the same, if you take the time....You are the One.... 

Penny Bowman

Giving Way

Time with the River

It has been over a week since I have taken the time to be with the river. Time to listen to spirit. I know I need that, so today I honour my spirit and that of the river with my being. I have learned over the years it is essential to feed my spirit if I want to feel connected within, and without. The rewards are always there in the peace and serentiy I feel. Today I ask the river to wash away the tears and emotions that have come to surface this morning, knowing that she will embrace them, and lovingly let them be until they have run their course. As always she speaks to me when I am still ...


hop aboard dear one
ride upon my shoulders,
I shall carry you
with wind and waves
for I yield to you
as I yield to rocks, and shore, and sand
offering no resistance
just allowing myself to give way
free to carry on my way...

Oh to be more like the river, naturally giving way to obstacles with such flexibility, fluidity and grace...
With gratitude once again dear River.

P